Well, folks, it seems I’ve been reminded yet again that I can’t have nice things. Today, I experienced the heartbreak that only pet owners will understand: the untimely death of my beloved Sennheiser Momentum 1 headphones. Cause of death? Feline sabotage. One of my adorable little black voids—Midnight or Shadow, I don’t even care which one at this point—decided that the aux cord was the perfect chew toy. And just like that, ten years of headphone loyalty were brutally cut short by some very sharp cat teeth.
To say I was upset is an understatement. You see, I had grand plans to listen to some tunes on my MP3 player while doing housework. Yes, you read that right—MP3 player. Go ahead, judge me. In this era of Bluetooth everything, I’m still out here rocking wired headphones and an MP3 like it’s 2008. Sue me. But now? Now my dreams of jamming out to my ‘Clean the House’ playlist (which, by the way, includes a lot of angry 2000s alt-rock—because let’s be real, nothing powers through chores like a good dose of angst) are dashed. Why? Because my little hell-spawns got hungry and decided to snack on my aux cord when I wasn’t looking.
Honestly, the most infuriating part is that I didn’t catch them in the act. No, of course not. That would have made too much sense. Cats are like tiny furry ninjas—they don’t break stuff when you’re in the room. They wait until you’re out of sight, grinning maniacally as they sharpen their claws and teeth on whatever object you foolishly believed was safe. And then, when you discover the crime scene? They just look at you with that innocent “Who, me?” face that almost makes you forget you’re furious. Almost.
Now, I’m not one of those monsters who scolds their pets after the fact. What’s the point? Cats, and dogs too for that matter, don’t remember what they did two minutes ago, let alone two hours ago. Yelling at them would just confuse them—and make me feel like a jerk. Plus, they wouldn’t care. These little sociopaths know they run the house. They know I’ll be the one shelling out the money to fix their mess. It’s a cat’s world; we’re just living in it.
So here I am, headphones-less and sad. But wait! There’s hope. I should be able to find a new replacement cord. It just has to have 2.5mm and 3.5mm aux jacks on each end to do the trick. I’ve decided to do the logical thing and head to Amazon to see if I can find a replacement cord. Will it work? Who knows. But the idea of buying a new pair of headphones makes me want to cry into my coffee. I’ve had these Sennheiser Momentum 1 headphones for over ten years. They’re practically family at this point. Do I really want to start over with some new, shiny pair that’ll probably come with an overpriced warranty and a “fragile, handle with care” warning? No thanks.
In the meantime, I could use my Razer Kraken headset, but let’s be real: I only use that thing for gaming. It’s bulky, the microphone makes me feel like I’m piloting a spaceship, and it’s just not the same when I’m trying to listen to music. My Sennheisers were like a cozy, familiar hug for my ears. The Razer? More like a headlock.
And can we talk about the state of headphones in general these days? Everyone is so obsessed with their teeny-tiny wireless earbuds. “Oh, look at me, I’m so trendy with my AirPods. I can barely tell they’re in my ears.” Yeah, well, good for you. I don’t want my headphones to be invisible, thanks. I don’t want to look like I’ve stuffed Q-tips into my ears and am hoping no one notices. Over-the-ear headphones are where it’s at—superior sound quality, noise-canceling bliss, and no risk of me losing one in the couch cushions. Plus, they don’t make me feel like I’ve become one with my smartphone, which, let’s face it, is just a bit too Black Mirror for my liking.
Despite their current state of being half-destroyed, the Sennheiser Momentum 1 headphones are still absolute beauties. They’ve been through a decade of music, podcasts, and video binges without ever failing me—until now, thanks to the combined efforts of my furry saboteurs. So, fingers crossed that a new cord can bring them back to life. Otherwise, I’ll be forced into the consumer hellscape of finding a replacement pair of headphones.
Until then, I guess I’ll have to rely on my gaming headset—and a healthy dose of coffee—to get through the day. And maybe some cat-proofing of my workspace while I’m at it. Because if Midnight and Shadow think they’re getting away with this one, they’ve got another thing coming.
Stay snarky,
~Rita 🖤